Big vs bijou: the wedding debate
Two fashion insiders who were also recent brides share their own magical wedding days – and reveal why they went big or bijou…
Taryn Shumway Bossi
Creative director and costume designer Bossi married her husband, Alex, in front of 12 friends in Los Angeles on November 13, 2020
“I think, by virtue of my career, whether I’m styling or designing stage costumes for Madonna, I’m used to being near the action – but behind the scenes. I don’t like being the center of attention, so the idea of having a wedding that involved lots of eyes on me just stressed me out. Going down to the courthouse on a whim and then having a big party was always more appealing to me than walking down the aisle in a big dress – then Covid took the decision out of our hands.
“When you’re going for a small guest list, there will always be people who aren’t happy with your decision, but we just kept reminding ourselves that it was our day. In the end, we didn’t even have our families there, but we explained our reasons and had private celebrations with them later in the year. I wore the same outfit and carried the same dried flowers I had at the ceremony, so it felt like a little piece of the wedding day was there.
“I always knew I wanted to get married in Danielle Frankel – her designs perfectly balance cool and beautiful
”Taryn Shumway Bossi
“I always knew I wanted to get married in Danielle Frankel – her designs perfectly balance cool and beautiful. I had initially picked a shirt dress, but then a friend of mine sent me a link to another outfit, a top and pants. I just looked at it and thought, ‘Wow this is beautiful, game over.’ Then I realized this new piece was called the ‘Maude’ top, which is my favorite name for a baby girl and also Alex’s great-grandmother’s name. It instantly felt right.
“When it came to choosing the venue, I’ve always loved the Sunset Tower Hotel. It’s so Old Hollywood; a little run-down but still glamorous – it just feels intimate and sexy. Alex and I were there for dinner one evening, discussing where to get married, and we just kind of looked at each other like, ‘Should we?’ We booked the penthouse the next day.
“Without a doubt, the best thing about having such an intimate wedding was that I got to really speak to and have a moment with all my guests. It was a really easy, fun day for everyone.”
Bettina Looney
Personal shopper and stylist Looney married her husband, Carlos, in front of 250 wedding guests in South Africa on February 15, 2020
“I was never really that girl who grew up planning her wedding; it wasn’t something I thought about until Carlos and I actually got engaged. We had gone to a wedding together in South Africa quite early on in our relationship and agreed if we ever got married, that’s where we’d do it. We wanted to bring our friends and family to this beautiful country and show them a different part of the world.
“When we first began planning our wedding, we went in with strong ideas about what we wanted – but, really, experiencing Cape Town and all it had to offer totally changed our minds. For instance, a friend of ours who lives in the city is a sculptor and he recommended the Dylan Lewis Sculpture Garden. We absolutely fell in love with the place and ended up holding one of our pre-wedding celebrations there.
“When I arrived at the sculpture garden and saw my closest girlfriends having their pictures taken in that stunning landscape, it was magical
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“There are so many women in my life that, throughout different periods, have [had] a huge impact on me, so choosing just a few to be my bridesmaids wasn’t possible. I wanted to honor them all. I knew I wanted them all to wear Tongoro – an African brand that uses sustainable fabrics sourced from Senegalese markets. The dresses turned out more beautifully than I could ever have imagined. When I arrived at the sculpture garden and saw my closest girlfriends having their pictures taken in that stunning landscape, it was magical.
“When it came to selecting my wedding dress, I knew I wanted to design a bespoke piece with Khyeli. I cried the first time I saw his work, which is very unusual for me, but I just love the beauty and elegance of what he does.
“To me, throwing a wedding is essentially like hosting a huge party with all your loved ones to celebrate two lives intertwining, and one of the most incredible things was seeing people make connections and knowing that your love brought them together. Some of our guests have become so close, they’ll send us pictures when they’re out at dinner together; some have even gone on group vacations.
“Looking back, I feel more grateful than ever that we even had the opportunity to have our wedding as planned. We have so many friends who were supposed to get married that same year who were forced to cancel. We could never have foreseen what was going to happen but, in a way, our wedding felt like one last hurrah.”
As seen in Harper’s Bazaar
The people featured in this story are not associated with NET-A-PORTER and do not endorse it or the products shown